I Get Email (War on Christmas Edition)

Ken writes:

Dear Chris,

I am not an atheist (more of a non-practicing Catholic) and was curious about your take on the “War on Christmas”.

Big fan of your site!

Certainly. There is no war on Christmas. There isn’t even a police action on Christmas. The only place the “War on Christmas” exists is in the hollow minds of spittle-flinging, ratings-craving, falafal-loofahing talking heads on Fox News and their perpetually perplexed followers.

As a militant atheist who even refuses to go to TGI Fridays because I find the G offensive (Although, whether the G stands for God or Goodness, the food still sucks), I have no problem at all when somebody wishes me Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah or Joyous Festivus. I’ll even say Merry Christmas back to them once they make it known that is their religion of choice. Returning a holiday greeting doesn’t make me part of that religion. It’s just being polite. But if I’m in a position where I must give a holiday greeting to strangers, I would say Happy Holidays of course. Why be presumptuous?

That some Christians get their crucifixes set to stunned because clerks in retail stores wish them “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas” just goes to prove their own intolerance and bigotry. There are many types of people from different cultures and religions (if any) who actually do shopping in December and there are many different variants of the Winter Solstice holiday. Anybody who believes that they’re being persecuted because a clerk at The Gap wished them “Happy Holidays” needs to be thrown to the lions.