Get Cynical

From here.
(via Winnerbowzer)

On a completely unrelated topic, I’m thinking about investing all my money in the tattoo removal industry.

I always thought that “little person” was the slur since it is insinuating that they’re barely a person and midget was the technical term. But what do I know?

Little people are calling on the Federal Communications Commission to ban the use of the word “midget” on broadcast TV.

The group Little People of America said today the word is just as offensive as racial slurs.

The request was prompted by an April episode of NBC’s “Celebrity Apprentice” that the group said was demeaning.

In the episode, contestants created a detergent ad called “Jesse James and the Midgets.” The contestants, including Joan Rivers, suggested bathing little people in the detergent and hanging them to dry.

I’d be less concerned with the word and more concerned that they’re using little people as laundry. But alas, what do I know? (Very little. I’m not even sure what category to put this under. Racism? How To? Bacon???)

From English Russia:

In Russia bacon is called “SALO” and people it it raw, the less meat and the more fat in it the better it is. They put it in the fridge, right in the freezer, it is not cutted but in one big piece, then take it off, slice it thin and eat with Russian bread and garlic.

From Bacon Today:

Yes. It’s true. We finally did it. If you liked bacon cinnamon rolls, you’re going to love this. The picture above is the result of the coming together of two major food groups. Meat and brownies (yes, they’re a food group) have finally found common ground and joined forces to form a uniquely irresistible combination of flavors. Not since chocolate and peanut butter came together to create the peanut butter cup have we seen the introduction of such a Smastey™ dessert food. The good news is that you too can make bacon brownies. Here’s how.

(Thanks e r)

From PopSci:

I recently committed myself to the goal, before the weekend was out, of creating a device entirely from bacon and using it to cut a steel pan in half. My initial attempts were failures, but I knew success was within reach when I was able to ignite and melt the pan using seven beef sticks and a cucumber.

No, seriously. The device I built was a form of thermal lance. A thermal lance, typically made of iron instead of bacon, is used to cut up scrap metal and rescue people from collapsed buildings. It works by blowing pure oxygen gas through a pipe packed with iron and magnesium rods. These metals are surprisingly flammable in pure oxygen, releasing a huge amount of heat as they are consumed. The result is a jet of superheated iron plasma coming out of the end of the pipe. For sheer destructive force, few tools match a thermal lance. But iron isn’t the only thing that’s flammable in a stream of pure oxygen.

From Ridiculous Food Society:

Bacon, Fuck Yeah!

Unfortunately you’ll need to part with your precious bacon fat (which is terrific drizzled over ice cream) to make bacon soap.

How to Prepare Bacon Soap:
This recipe is a basic soap recipe.
• 7.5 parts bacon fat
• 1 part lye
• 2 parts water

A). Melt the bacon fat on the stove. Do not get it too hot (not boiling/sizzling – very dangerous).

B). Skim off any particles or debris that float to the surface of the melted bacon fat.

C). Pour the melted bacon fat through cloth or paper towels into a large clean metal can (see photo), this will further filter the bacon fat.

(Your move Mr. Carroll)

(via Serious Eats)

This post is bittersweet. Sweet because it contains bacon but bitter because I’m openly being mocked by astrophysicists on their Discover magazine blog.

It’s actually more of a wiki than a church. But if I don’t post this now I’ll have this forwarded to me over and over again.

The Holy Church of Bacon [alternatively THCoB, CoB] aims to promote consumption of, and unfaltering love for, the holiest of holy foods: Bacon. We believe Bacon to be more worthy of nourishing the human body than any other food in existence. We abide by the Five Baconic Laws and live our lives in pursuit of the Bacony truth.

(via YesButNoButYes)