What I Learned Today – Monday, March 141st

Good morning. Let’s cut to the chase today. What fresh hell has happened over the weekend?

The CDC has updated guidance on post-covid immunity declaring that people who have recovered from covid-19 should be safe for at least three months.

We have officially passed 170,000 coronavirus deaths in the US. It still has not disappeared, like magic.

Florida Man DeathSantis says that schools should not shutdown just because someone gets covid. I don’t think he quite understands yet the meaning of the phrase ‘highly contagious’.

One positive thing about Trump being not just the worst candidate in modern history, but also a really shitty human being, is it’s very easy to figure out which organization and people are also terrible just by how quick they are to endorse him.

In completely unrelated news, the NYPD Union just endorsed Trump.

The US Postal Workers Union has endorsed Biden.

Nancy Pelosi is calling back the House to vote on the current USPS crisis. I guess the big question here is if Louis DeJoy refuses to show up, do Democrats just gnash their teeth and throw up their hands or actually take a stand and force him to show up or face an actual penalty. I’m fully prepared to be disappointed.

The Democratic Convention begins today.  Weird for it to begin so early in…… Oh, it’s mid-August now???  My god. Michelle Obama will be speaking last for tonight and yes, I’ll be watching her speech and just looking through Twitter for any other highlights.

The history of astronaut ice cream. I’m fairly certain I haven’t had this since a fifth grade field trip to the Boston Museum of Science (where it’s fun to find out!).  I remember it tasting like strawberry infused styrofoam.

A juvenile duck is released into a pond.  You know those sweet videos where the animal is released into the wild and turns back for one thank you glance of appreciation and love for the human who nursed them back to health?