• mrclam

    “It’s my serve, right?”

    • MacCrocodile

      [with invisible racket aloft] “Love all!”

  • mrclam

    Jesus, with bowling ball, does a screen test for the role of Jesus in “The Big Lebowski”.

    • MacCrocodile

      He’ll never get it. I just don’t buy him as the Jesus.

  • MacCrocodile

    I am the king of ridiculous religious imagery! In your face, Mohammed! Can I get a what what!

  • MacCrocodile

    “And the first runner-up is… Miss Kansas which means Miss Judea is our winner!”

  • MacCrocodile

    Jesus prepares to check the Earth’s temperature… the old-fashioned way.

    • MacCrocodile

      Really? Butt jokes is what does it for you guys?

      *sigh*

      It’s like I’ve never seen the internet before.

      • outeast

        …and here was me wondering what that image has to do with a thermometer under the armpit.

  • FlamingAtheist

    “Ok, this one will be off Venus, around Mars, through the rings of Saturn, bouncing off Uranus and into the Sun for ‘S'” – “H.O.R.S.E. of the gods”

  • Dale

    Jesus put that down! It’s not a frisbee!

  • Dale

    Jesus checks the direction of the wind before taking his shot.

  • MacCrocodile

    “Miss? Miss! You dropped something! Oh whatever, I’ll just keep it.”

  • Mike K

    … He’s got the whole wide world… in his hand…

  • Mike K

    “Mom! Mom! Look what I found! Can I keep it?”
    (And you all know how the rest of the story turned out.)

    • MacCrocodile

      Eventually, Earth got rabies, and Jesus had to take it out back and shoot it.

  • Dale

    Jesus mime’s riding a crowded city bus.

  • dave

    “Fuck it, Dude. Let’s go bowling.”

    • dave

      Damn. I thought a Big Lebowski quote would have been popular.

  • Dale

    “I, Jesus H. Christ, do solemnly swear to my dad that I will ……”

  • Dale

    “Scout’s honor.”

  • Ryno68

    In 2012, a giant bearded man will rip the earth from it’s orbit. Proving that the Mayan Calendar did predict the end of the world.

  • MacCrocodile

    Jesus reminds Alice Kramden that–one of these days–bang, zoom…

  • hinten

    He put his hands lovingly around it and said: ‘Cough, please.’

  • Dale

    Jesus checks the Earth for lumps.

    • MacCrocodile

      “There’s no easy way to say this, but… we found lumps just north of your Indian subcontinent. They appear to be growing.”

  • pvc

    “I got it, beam me up.”

  • Karl

    I’m taking my ball and going home!

  • outeast

    Jesus
    Has only Got One Ball!

  • outeast

    Yeah, Jesus is pretty big. But the Beatles’re holding Saturn.

  • outeast

    Incidently, is the sun really shining out of jesus’ arse there? i thought that was idiom, not scripture.

  • outeast

    Howizzzeeeeeeaaaaahhhh – ahem. Sorry, got a bit carried away there.

    • outeast

      (That was fucken hilarious btw. You just didn’t get it.)

  • jen

    Jesus’ Earth Tango, badah booomp boom boomp…yah dah da da dah

  • Jesus holds mass.

  • apachesux

    During the winter months, Jesus lets the world out of his robe and we are cold. Praise Jesus.

  • Stephen

    Big Ern McCracken now needs to bowl three strikes in a row to win the championship!

  • Mike K

    I guess he saw the message on that blimp from Scarface and just ran with it.