Question of the Day

What candy/dessert can you not stand?

Oatmeal raisin cookies. That’s not a dessert. It’s breakfast. And the worst part is if you’re not paying attention you could bite into it mistaking the raisins for chocolate chips.

And candy/caramel apples get a runner-up mention. I’m not smart enough to have figured out how to eat the damn things without losing a few teeth.

66 Comments

  1. I’ll pass on any combo of Peanut Butter and Chocolate, the two mixed are an abomination. Thought I hated Pistachio pie until someone gave me a gourmet version for a birthday present, could have eaten the whole thing at one sitting.

  2. Bread & Butter Pudding. What the fuck.

    Bread soaked in egg & milk, plus some raisins and sugar.

    Get out of my life, you idiots. That’s not a dessert, it’s horrifying.

  3. Cool Whip! What the fuck do I want with some sort of plasticized fake topping. Give me real whipped cream, with just a hint of sugar and vanilla.

    Same with pretty much any fake sugar desert. Why eat chemicals that taste worse than sugar to avoid a few calories. You’re eating desert – deal with it.

  4. This probably dates me, but there used to be this awful candy at movie theaters called JuJuBees. They were fruit flavored (barely) sort of hard gummy things which were perfectly engineered to extract any dental work from your mouth. Those would be the worst. Oh, and “Circus Peanuts”, those big bright orange marshmallowey things in the shape of giant peanuts. Couldn’t eat ’em, couldn’t trade them for anything in anyone else’s Halloween bag. Confectionery landfill.

  5. I don’t know if this counts but I can’t stand cotton candy. It is just the grossest combination of flavour, texture and melt in your mouthiness. EWWWW

  6. Oatmeal Raisin Cookies…MMMMMMMMM! Just wait, you’ll want that fiber some day Chris.

    Necco wafers, marshmallowy things as mentioned like Peeps/Circus Peanuts are near the bottom. As are most things with coconut which just reminds me of toenail clippings.

  7. I’m with Rob-Ert, I hate Reese’s Peanut Butter cups! YUK!!!

    Also, mint chocolate stuff is equally disgusting.

  8. Actually, I like circus peanuts–in moderation. As for marzipan, you need to get the good, quality stuff. Some of the cheap marzipan isn’t worthy of the name.

    What I dislike that hasn’t already been mentioned? Licorice! Ugh!

    And anything with coconut in it.

  9. Completely agree on the Cool Whip. It tastes like fluffy non-dairy creamer. Aw, how I hate Necco Wafers. They suck the spirit and vitality right out of you through your tongue. Also on the dots and the Ju-Ju-Bes.

    Keep nuts out of my dessert. Dessert is meant to be enjoyable, not to be spent picking stuff out of your teeth.

  10. Anything banana flavored is gross (but I love “real” bananas), the same goes for watermelon. Oh, and I can’t forget Moonpies, absolutely disgusting!

  11. Any sour, brightly colored candies- Sweet Tarts and their ilk, I cannot abide.

    Hard candies go untouched by me.

    I like licorice, but “Snaps” are disgusting. Who puts a candy shell coating on a bit of stale noodle?

    Sheet cakes with Crisco based frosting- bleech!

    Love chocolate- but if it says “Palmer” on the box, forget it. I’m not sure why fundamentalist Christians don’t take this up as an issue- Jesus died on the cross so their kids would find a waxy, tasteless hollow rabbit in Easter basket? Palmer- now THAT’S a sin against the world of sweets.

  12. I’ve never understood the appeal of marshmallows. The taste and texture (or lack of it) always turned me off. It’s like biting into some kind of soft plastic.

  13. Oatmeal Raisin is my favourite cookie.
    Marzipan is okay in small quantities and in context.
    Bread and butter pudding is fantastic, if made well. And with maple syrup.
    Caramel apples I hate, probably from some experiences with bad apples inside them when young.
    What I don’t like are those powdery candies in rolls, called Rockets here in Canada and (I believe) smarties in the US. Bleargh.

  14. Ugh, Cool Whip. Real whipped cream is just about the best thing in the world.

    I hate sorbet/sherbet. If I’m going to eat something that comes in a pint from the freezer case, it better have cream, fat, and preferably something chocolaty. I’m with you, LL: if you have dessert – have dessert! Plus, sorbets are usually sour; sour dessert is no good in my book.

  15. I don’t think I can jump on any of these bandwagons except the circus peanuts one. I don’t remember those things being anything other than nasty.

  16. Seriously, I don’t like chocolate chip cookies, or anything with mint in it, like mint ice cream, Thin Mints, little chocolate mint after dinner candies. Though I do like mint life savers and such as a breath freshner.

  17. Carrot cake is one of the few things I’ll flat out refuse, entirely an abomination.

    Zucchini spice cake is a close second, not to be confused with zucchini chocolate cake, one of the moistest most delicious chocolate cakes ever made.

  18. Anything with chocolate and peanut mixed together. That is just plain wrong, like Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups UGH BLAH. Who came up with that idea? That is just nasty…

  19. I’m gonna have to second carmel apples (candy apples as they’re called somewhere). Seriously, what the fuck was wrong with people that these ever got popular? I’ll admit the flavoring is wonderful (so carmel dippers for apples, yay!), but biting into an enormous sticky as hell hard fruit? Lame.

  20. I like chocolate. I like coconut. Chocolate + Coconut mixed together in any dessert/candy = disgusting to my taste buds.

    The choconut combo, though disgusting, does not come even remotely close to my hatred for all things black licorice flavored though. BLECH. The smell alone makes me gag uncontrollably. How that stuff can be called candy, and even worse, how anyone could eat it voluntarily is completely beyond me.

  21. i hate that fake jelly fruit flavour they put in some chocolates, like cherry filling. yuck. i also hate candy corns… just nasty fake sweetness. and those marsh mellow candies.

  22. Merengue…. SO gross. Either on pies or those merengue cookies. Egg whites should not be served as dessert.

    And cakes with fondant wrapped around them. They’re pretty, but that fondant is like eating pure sugar mixed with crisco. So gross.

  23. circus peanuts, necco wafers, wax bottles, licorice, candy dots, anything that was considered the last thing you would eat out of your halloween bag. I was allergic to chocolate as a kid so guess what I got most of. I’m with you on the jujubes – my brother got milk duds I got those waxy tasteless things. Until I discovered LemonHeads – love the LemonHeads!

    But my BIGGEST dessert hate in MINCEMEAT PIE! AUUUGHHH!!!

    If you ever have a real handmade marshmallow it is a revelation – I cannot eat the fake ones anymore. Also real Fluff is amazing too – with peanut butter on pumpernickel…. Ah crap now I need an insulin shot…

  24. You people who don’t like peanut butter and chocolate are going to hell.

    I don’t like most fruit desserts. Fruit is good for you, dessert is supposed to be stuff like chocolate and caramel.

  25. Flan.

    All the moreso because it *sounds* like it should be my favorite thing. Custard? Yes. Caramel? Hell, yes.

    But then it’s this nauseatingly-sweet, artificial-tasting *thing*. Even when homemade, even by the mothers and grandmothers of various friends and neighbors.

  26. Pontefract Cakes. They’re called cakes, but actually they’re liquorice candy. There’s nothing wrong with liquorice candy, but when I order cake I expect cake.

  27. Black licorice and all things flavored like black licorice. *gag* I mean I can take a little anise flavor in mulled wine or something else spicy, but flat out licorice flavor kills me.

    Also peeps, cherry cordials, and cheap birthday cake with that sickenly sweet icing.

  28. I’ll second the abhorrance to JuJuBees. I hate those things. Also, pecan pie is horrible. Apple, peach, apricot, berry pies are awesome, but pecan pie, not so much.

  29. Anything with mint in it. Mint parfaits used to be chi-chi desserts Back When the Earth was Young. Ick, they were nasty.

    Black licorice, including black jelly beans. Jelly beans should be happy fruit colors and flavors.

    And though it’s technically not dessert, that sweet potato casserole covered with marshmallows that people eat as a side dish at Thanksgiving. Sorry, but it’s a gooey, sicky-sweet mess

  30. For the haters of candy (caramel) apples. The apples from here are amazing…and the caramel isn’t hard, but almost creamy and soft. Plus they’ll cut it up for you if you’re still scared.

    http://www.rmcf.com

  31. chocolate covered raisins. i can spot oatmeal raisin cookies which are equally horrid, but chocolate covered raisins are the stealth fighter of horrid candies.

    divinity. reminds me of old school white chalky toothpaste. why would i eat this?

    popcorn balls. had one of my friends hand out these every halloween, each equally terrible… tasted like cardboard that had been aged in your grandmothers attic for about 20 years.

  32. For me, it begins and ends with fruitcake. Every couple of years, I give it a try, thinking perhaps my palate has matured to the point where I will enjoy it, and every time I have to fight the urge to spit it out. I don’t always win that fight.

  33. Same concerns about the oatmeal cookies. Especially with those raisins trying to pass as chocolate chips.

    And butterscotch hard candy.

    I always traded away my Butterfinger candy bar at Halloween. Not even real chocolate coating but that gross hydrogenated palm kernel oil and cocoa blend.

  34. Black licorice is vile (especially the traditional dutch stuff that’s hard as a rock) Black jelly beans are the ones that died on the way to the store…

    Marzipan is horrid. I must have seen over 50 wedding cakes that were frosted with it (we have a venue for rent) Usually end up throwing most of it away, everybody scrapes it off their piece of cake. Most ‘creative’ use of marzipan was for faux bamboo on the cake, NOBODY ate it. Sometimes the stuff is half an inch thick and the consistency of candle wax. Damn near need a chainsaw to cut the cake.

  35. Rampage_Rick, funny I will eat good marzipan frosting, but usually scrape the sicky sweet crisco based crap off. I’ve never had a store bought sheet cake that was even remotely good.

  36. Peanut butter cookies make me want to wretch! And anything consisting of candied fruit! Oh yeah and Cadbury Creme Eggs ew ew ew ew…..

  37. Orange flavored chocolate. Just the smell of it makes me want to hurl, due to a severe overdose one easter morning when I was 8.

  38. Rampage_Rick- loved your line about the dead jellybeans.

    As an act of kindness, I always offer to take licorice flavored items from licorice hating friends and consume them.

    My husband says a most disgusting dessert is custard. Which he calls,

    “Pus-tard”.

  39. Ha! Hilarious answers all around. Moon-pies have a place in my heart because they remind me of Po’ Folks, a now torn down restaurant my family used to frequent after church. Too bad Moon pies are actually terrible.

    Why the peanut butter chocolate hate? And the mint chocolate? More for me I guess.

    My vote is fruitcake.

  40. i don’t know if this counts as a dessert or not but uh…
    chocolate chip bagels.
    fucking gross.

    i thought i was biting into a cinnamon raisin bagel (because im partially color blind and cant distinguish dark brown from dark purple, apparently) and it was like there was a party in my mouth, and everyone was throwing up.

  41. I had a coworker make cookies at christmas that I thought were chocolate chip except with M&M’s instead of chips. To my dismay, it turned out to actually be jelly beans… what a let down!

  42. I don’t like either one, but there IS a difference. Candy Apples have a red, hard candy coating. Caramel apples have a uh, caramel coating. Both require emergency dental procedures after eating. Oh, and maripan rules! All hail Ben & Jerry’s for Mission to Marzipan!!!

  43. Chinese fortune cookies. They’re just nasty tasting. Crack ’em open, read the fortune, chuck them both. Spice flavored jelly beans are just a cruel joke, you eat a red one thinking “mmm, cherry” and you get clove or anise flavor. Wtf…….

  44. Reading all the comments is great! Never ceases to amaze me, what people like or dislike.

    Me? Hate butterscotch. Like circus peanuts. LOVE chocolate-covered raisins, especially dark-chocolate. Peanut butter ‘n’ chocolate is just too rich. Love cheesecake & carrot cake. Licorice only in small doses (which means I won’t like absinthe, I’m sure).

    And my sweetie hates anything mint: says it gags him because it makes him think he’s eating toothpaste.

  45. Claire #42 has it exactly right. Those spice flavored gumdrops are an abomination. My grandmother would drag me over to my great grandparents home once a week, and we would sit there with them for 2 or 3 hours. It was torture, the house smelled as if the towns pets had been buried under the floor, covered in saw dust drizzled with formaldehyde. They both talked painfully slow, had deformed fingers and noses, you could tell that he windows hadnt been open in years, and the room was always devoid of any sort of light. My only saving grace was an end table with foreign currency displayed under a glass plate, and a crystal goblet of candy i would stare at for atleast 30 mins of the visit – oh how wonderful those gummy things would taste right now, i thought. But it would be rude to run up and grab one. My grandmother was stern and would often hold me by the ear or the fatty soft flesh on the back of my arm. Goddam those candies had to be good if I was withstanding that sort of pain, if only one day I could just get one.. Well… that f*cking day happened. I actually cried. Id pay $1000 to have a picture of my face when that horrid little tramp shat all over my mouth.

Comments are closed.