You Can’t Please Everyone – The Hobbit

One star Amazon reviews of classic movies, music and literature. Today we take a look at The Hobbit:

Don’t read this book, it is impossible to follow, has way too many details, and was down right boring. Horrible book.

Maybe 1 star is a little low for this book…should have given it like…2, but there are just better books. how can this be the best if there is better? i reccomend a better book like Harry Potter(1-4).

This is just a horrible book. My school is forcing me to read it. It is just so boreing. I don’t even think my teacher can take it anymore beacause we have been reading it for 3 monthes and we only got up to chapter 10. You see, we have to read it outloud in class. I dought we will ever finish this horrible book. Spend your money on Harry Potter instead.

Do not read this book. There was absolutely nothing about answering how long it would take to go by boat or by tomorrow. Doesn’t make sense? It doesn’t have to make sense it is all fantasy. And what’s this thing about hairy feet? Oh yes, the Joy of Cooking was never mentioned as being on Bilbo’s cook book shelf in his little Hobbit house. Very disappointing. I would have given the book 0 stars but this isn’t an option. And why didn’t the author stay alive long enough to defend his work from this vicious critique?

Why people claim to enjoy this book I’ll never know. The writing style doesn’t flow, the characters aren’t particularly all that well developed, and the storyline isn’t all that interesting. This is a prime example of what happens when Star Trek and Star Wars dorks pick up a book. They see the word “wizard” or “dragon” and get all gooey with excitement and think it’s great literature.

This “book” is a travesty to everything ever written. Swoar, lil’ fools wack for REALL. J.R.R. Tolkien is clearly a man of minimal intellect and an insufficient grasp on what a a real novel is composed of. Boy, ain’t nuffin’ but a playa-hatin scrub!.

The Hobbit I found was boring and so happy it was annoying. The characters are so happy it’s annoying. I like characters with a lot of back ground and I like many characters I can relate to. A bunch of identical dwarves don’t do the job. They also don’t fit the spirit of dwarves, but then again after time they evolved into the grumpy alchoholics fantasy tends to portray them as. All the characters were corny and annoying. Anyway, don’t get me wrong about it. I understood it. I loved the Dragonlance chronicles and Wheel of Time which made this book look so childish. I’ve heard Lord of the Rings is much better so I might read that. It doesn’t seem as happy perfect utopia where elves dance and sing songs all day as The Hobbit was.

Okay, if you’ve never in your life read an epic fantasy then you might like it. But still, when I read this book I was at a point where I was reading four hundred-page novels per two to three days, but it took me hours to get through the first couple chapters. It doesn’t really make sense how the dwarves would want such a bumbling fool to help them. And anyway, dwarves and Hobbits, etc., etc. aren’t exactly my favorite fantasy races. Oh well.

I HAD TO READ THIS BOOK FOR SCHOOL. AND IT IS THE MOST BORING INCOMPREHENSIBLE BOOK I HAVE EVER HAD TO READ! MAYBE BECAUSE I WAS FORCED TO READ IT…MAYBE BECAUSE IT REALLY IS A BAD BOOK. I JUST ABSOLUTELY DETEST IT! AND I’M ONLY 13!

If you have some extra time on your and feel like pissing it away, then read this book. I love literature;however, I cannot believe I wasted valuable hours of my life on reading this so called book. I’ve read technical manuals that are more interesting. If there is someone you really don’t like, suggest that they read this book.

Why was this book written? I was forced to read it against my will by my english teacher. Why it is a “classic,” I’ll never know. There are WAY too many characters and place names. THe guy who wrote this really needed to get a life. Perhaps I’d have liked it better if I hadn’t had a Stephen King book sitting on my desk begging to be read. I thought that once I’d finished it that I was through, but I wasn’t so lucky. My teacher then forced us to read the first part of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. That book is even worse than this one, but that’s a whole other review. So, in conclusion, I beg of you, whatever you do STAY AWAY FROM THIS BOOK AT ALL COSTS!!!!!!!

this isnt a good book and i suggest u not read it cuz it will just make u not want to read any othe tolkien books!!!!

This book, sorry to say, REALLY SUCKS!! Maybe becuase its a child’s novel is the reason i did’nt like it but let me say something if your 15 up i DO NOT recomend this book for you!!!!

This book was pretty bad. Shame on all of the people who gave it 5 stars and encouraged me to read it. It was boring. There was no character development outside of Bilbo, and I despised his character. It was filled with stupid songs, and had the most unimaginitive monsters I have ever read about in a fantasy novel. This book has turned me off from reading any of Tolkien’s other books.

I could never seem to get into this book; why? It is a tale of ‘Bilbo Baggins’ and his journey with Gandalf and the dwarves to find treasure, and defeat the ‘evil dragon’, Smaug. It seems pointless; adventure after adventure, many characters, and no main theme. It was a childish and boring book (as well a series).

This has to be the absolute WORST piece of “literature” I have ever read. I really like to read, but this is awful! The paragraphs are too long with no main sentence with a few detail sentences. They are 20-30 sentences long that are so boring it reminded me of the sweet relief that death would bring! So I repeat: If you can, don’t read this novel!

🙁 Boo! 🙁 Boo! 🙁 Boo! 🙁 Boo! 🙁 Boo!:-(

“BOO FOR YOU HOBBIT!”

“DIE HOBBITS, DIE!”

“DEATH TO HOBBITS!”

This book had way to many characters! Is boring from start to end and has no point! What the hell does this book mean?

Everyone I’ve ever heard from who has read Tolkein ether loves him or hates him, and having The Hobbit as assigned reading seems to greatly raise the likelyhood of hating it. It’s just too much of a “My First Fantasy Novel” to really interest me, even when I first read it at age 10 or so. Of course, by then, I was already into Mercedes Lackey and other fantasy, so the almost-nonexistant character personalities and and uninteresting creatures (Orcs and one smelly dragon.Wow.) showed their true blandness in contrast.

And where are the female characters? E-mail me if there are some and I’ve just forgotton, but from what I remember, there are no women at all that are more than just mentioned. Was Tolkien really that much of a chauvenist?

If you thought that this book was okay, but not fantastic, and that some parts were a bit too boring, whatever you do, DO NOT READ THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING!!!! It’s even more boring!

Take my advice. I know Tolkein was the first, but did he have to make it so obvious?

Warning: Don’t read this book. It’ll scare you from reading any other book The Hobbit stinks. The Hobbit is terrible. The Hobbit is down right boring. It’s hard to follow and is extremely dumb. It faces in on Bilbo Baggins, a lonely hobbit. Suddenly, he is left with a band of dwarves, who take him on an adventure. All he worries about is that he left his handkerchief at home. While he faces evil orcs, goblins, and wolves, he gains the respect of the other dwarves with the help of a magic ring. He also ends up in mental challenges as well as physical, such as a riddle contest with Gollum, a creature from the sea. The last few chapters about facing the dragon Smaug, are very hard to follow. To tell the truth, I probably don’t know how it ends. I strongly recommend that you do not read this book. I think that J. R. R. Tolkien did a terrible job of tying the book together. Unless you want to be bored to death, do not read the famous The Hobbit.

Wow .. this is the worst book I’ve ever read!! I would NEVER ever tell anyone to read this! It’s just so weird and BORING. Don’t waste your money! AHH .. I hated this book with a passion!

I think that this book is THE WORST BOOK THAT I HAVE EVER READ! If you see this and are thinking of buying it, DON’T! I chose to do it for a book report because my mom liked it (what’s wrong with her? ) and literally had to force myself to read it! I almost burned the stupid book and would have if it were mine. I was looking through the reviews for Dragons of Autumn Twilight and someone rated it badly because it was no “Hobbit” of “J.R.R. Tolkien” and I’m thinking THANK GOODNESS! Read Dragonlance or Tamora Pierce instead.

This is such a horrible book. There is no action and Bilbo Baggins is the biggest a$$ in a fantasy novel ever.