Daily Dose of Ingersoll


There are two ways: The narrow way along which the selfish go
in single file, not wide enough for husband and wife to walk side
by side while children clasp their hands. The narrow road over the
desert of superstition “with here and there a traveler.” The narrow
grass-grown path, filled with flints and broken glass, bordered by
thistles and thorns, where the twice-born limping walk with
bleeding feet. If by this path you see a flower, do not pick it. It
is a temptation. Beneath its leaves a serpent lies. Keep your eyes
on the New Jerusalem. Do not look back for wife or child or friend.
Think only of saving your own soul. You will be just as happy in
heaven with all you love in hell. Believe, have faith, and you will
be rewarded for the goodness of another. Look neither to the right
nor left. Keep on, straight on, and you will save your worthless,
withered, selfish soul.

This is the narrow road that leads from earth to the
Christian’s heartless heaven.

There is another way — the broad road. Give me the wide and
ample way, the way broad enough for us all to go together. The
broad way where the birds sing, where the sun shines and the
streams murmur. The broad way, through the fields where the flowers
grow, over the daisied slopes where sunlight, lingering, seems to
sleep and dream.

Let us go the broad way with the great world, with science and
art, with music and the drama, with all that gladdens, thrills,
refines and calms.

Let us go the wide road with husband and wife, with children
and friends and with all there is of joy and love between the dawn
and dusk of life’s strange day.

This world is a great orange tree filled with blossoms, with
ripening and ripened fruit, while, underneath the bending boughs,
the fallen slowly turn to dust.

Each orange is a life. Let us squeeze it dry, get all the
juice there is, so that when death comes we can say; “There is
nothing left but withered peel,”

Let us travel the broad and natural way. Let us live for man.

Robert Green Ingersoll – “Which Way” (1884)

Evel Knievel’s Failed Jump over the Fountains at Caesars Palace

While in Las Vegas, Nevada, to watch Dick Tiger fight a middleweight title fight, Knievel first saw the fountains at Caesar’s Palace and decided to jump them. To get an audience with the casino’s CEO Jay Sarno, Knievel created a fictitious corporation called Evel Knievel Enterprises and three fictitious lawyers to make phone calls to Sarno. Knievel also placed phone calls to Sarno claiming to be from ABC-TV and Sports Illustrated inquiring about the jump. Sarno finally agreed to meet Knievel and the deal was set for Knievel to jump the fountains on December 31, 1967. After the deal was set, Knievel tried to get ABC to air the event live on Wide World of Sports. ABC declined, but said that if Knievel had the jump filmed and it was as spectacular as he said it would be, they would consider using it later.

Wikipedia has more on this FAIL!

When he hit the takeoff ramp, he felt the motorcycle unexpectedly decelerate. The sudden loss of power on the takeoff caused Knievel to come up short and land on the safety ramp which was supported by a van. This caused the handlebars to be ripped out of his hands as he tumbled over them onto the pavement where he skidded into the Dunes parking lot. As a result of the crash, Knievel suffered a crushed pelvis and femur, fractures to his hip, wrist and both ankles and a concussion that kept him in a coma for 29 days. After his crash and recovery Knievel was more famous than ever.

Round Up the Usual Brown People

From the AZCentral:

Maricopa County Sheriff’s Office deputies raided a Mesa landscaping company early Wednesday, arresting nearly three dozen people suspected of being in the country illegally.

The raid at the offices of Artistic Land Management, on Main Street just west of Dobson Road, began about 4:30 a.m., according to one worker who was handcuffed but later released after producing documentation that he was in the country legally.

“What Sheriff Joe is doing is an abuse of power,” Luis Juarez, the employee who was detained, said through a translator.

Jose Hernandez, 35, of Chandler, listed in Corporation Commission records as the company’s owner, could not be reached for comment Wednesday afternoon.

Among those arrested are suspects in criminal fraud cases and others with warrants, according to Capt. Paul Chagolla, an MCSO spokesman.

Juarez said workers were handcuffed with plastic zip-ties while deputies checked for documents. Those who could provide proof they were in the country legally were released, while others were put on buses and taken away, he said.

(via Coyote Blog)