Get Cynical

Thank god they are bringing this show back.

Gun advocate: Guns don’t kill people, dangerous minorities do.

Stewie’s Letter: Dear stupid dog, I’ve gone to live with the children on jolly farm.
Good bye forever.
Stewie.
P.S. I never got a chance to return that sweater Lois gave me for Christmas. Umm, I left the receipt on top of my bureau. I’m probably over the thirty day return limit but umm… I’m sure if you make a fuss they’ll at least give you a store credit or something. Umm.. It’s actually not a horrible sweater. It’s… It’s just I can’t imagine when I would ever wear it you know? Oh I also left a button on the bureau. I’m not sure what it goes to, but I can never bring myself to throw a button away. I know that as soon as I do I’ll find the garment it goes to and then it’ll… Wait a minute, could it be from the sweater? Did that sweater have buttons? Hmm… Well I should wrap this up before I start to ramble. Again, goodbye forever.
P.P.S. You know, it might be a little chilly in London, I’m actually going to take the sweater.

(via The Ultimate Insult)

I wonder how big a plane has to get before it is no longer called a model.

And I thought I hated my city.

The town where everything seem to suck. The kids are stupid, the adults are even dumber, and there isn’t a damn thing to do. We warned you and you didn’t listen, now get in the fucking town.

I love The Daily Show. It is the funniest show on tv right now and shows what a joke the “real” news channels have become. Lisa Rein’s blog keeps track of the highlights of the Daily Show.

This is a very good site with info about things that have been banned in the record industry such as The Beatles’ “Butcher Cover“.

The Beatles – Yesterday and Today [a.k.a. “The Butcher Cover”] The Beatles were the first band powerful enough to really challenge their label overlords. The fact that they had issued only seven LPs from 1964–’66 in England, but Capitol Records had hacked those into a more profitable ten LPs in America, rankled. The final straw was the issuance of Yesterday and Today – an album that didn’t even exist in the UK and was, in fact, cobbled together out of odds and ends: three songs from Revolver, three from Rubber Soul, two from Help!, and two from a single. Reportedly outraged that their art was being “butchered,” the Fab Four posed for this photo while wearing butcher smocks draped with cuts of meat and dismembered baby-doll parts. Infected with accute Beatlemania, Capitol apparently overlooked the questionable image and released it in June, 1966.

(The last two from Bifurcated Rivets)

From this list, I might be living in a sitcom.

• Always forget whatever happened last week.
• Never explain; always lie or scheme your way out of situations.
• Hide under tables, in closets, etc. to eavesdrop or to avoid seeing someone.